Momentum

I had a bit of difficult week. I think my worse breakdowns are when many small issues or problems begin to pile up, and soon enough an incredibly daunting mountain of tasks and obstacles loom over me and it seems impossible to do even the simplest of things. Between family issues, internal conflicts, and school I felt terrible. I thought it might've been a mistake trying to return to school full force with a full schedule of 15 credits. I wasted two whole days wallowing in my distraught of the threat that I would waste more opportunities and fall further behind, but there's nothing more frustrating to me than feeling like I can't do anything.

I don't know how anyone else attributes their success or motivation, but I personally point towards the content I was exposed to as a child and until even now. I might've mentioned before that I am not close with my family, so my "heroes" were never my parents or siblings. I honestly attribute a lot of my personality to cartoons/anime, video games, comics, and the such. I recognize how unrealistic it can might present or how uncanny it'll to reveal that some of my biggest inspirations are fictional, but I can't lie that seeing the hero/underdog rise to the occasion and defeat their rival/nemesis inspires me. Often I'll imagine my short-comings or flaws as inner demons or frightening opponents and I'll create a feeling where I want to surge forward and realize my own success through focus, commitment, and sheer willpower. It was through this that I manage to rise above my wallowing and tear through what was bringing me down. I completed all my school assignments, I ignored my self-esteem issues, and avoided my toxic family. I feel on top of the world and I am ready to keep going until I fall, but I'm not worried because I know I'll always get back up.

First Step

My first time enrolling in a weekend class and one under IS as a subject, and I'm really excited to advance my technology proficiency in many more ways than I thought possible. It has honestly been such a breath of fresh air to have a professor be extremely proactive in making a course student-driven and wholeheartedly independent. Its not often that professors reveal an actual passion for what they do, and I can really find an appreciate in Professor Wu's engagement and drive to introduce an actual meaningful experience in the form of this course.

I mean it was a definite blindside hit to immediately get a professor reaching out on email and text messages the before the semester technically even start. More than that, he encouragingly asked for students to join a video call to meet and get a head start on the semester. I thought that was really great and actually gave me a decent push to start on my other courses more eagerly. It was these precautionary steps that made me excited to come to class on a weekend! I think I'll actually enjoy this course and I'm looking forward to the rest of it.